


Tonight

by ddelusionall



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Post-Lawsuit Era (DBSK), angsty angst, painful conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-10
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:14:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23928979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddelusionall/pseuds/ddelusionall
Summary: Yunho runs into Yoochun.
Relationships: Kim Jaejoong/Park Yoochun, Past Jung Yunho (DBSK)/Kim Jaejoong - Relationship





	Tonight

**Author's Note:**

> I am importing my stories from LiveJournal. The original fic can be found [here](http://be-ddelusionall.livejournal.com/).
> 
> I haven't read this story in a long time, so I may have missed some tags. Just let me know if I did.

Yunho stuttered to a stop, one foot actually in the air in the middle of his next step. The alleyway was dim, choked with moisture from the spring storm, but he’d know that silhouette anywhere. Leaning against the wall, one booted foot up against the brick. Slim body angled, head back. Wires ending at earphones.

Yunho wondered what music Yoochun was listening to. Whose music.

Yunho had two options. Turn around and go back to the studio where Changmin was waiting to film a variety show. Or keep walking. Their companies were usually pretty good at making sure they weren’t in the same place at the same time. But things were complicated when Yunho and Changmin were doing promotions and five shows a day, and Yoochun was filming a movie and a drama.

Yunho wasn’t sure what he’d do if he kept walking. Yoochun was not one of his favorite people right now, and it had a lot less to do with the lawsuit and a lot more to do with the way Jaejoong smiled at him.

Yoochun moved, sliding a cigarette into his mouth. He patted his pockets. The soft English _fuck_ echoed through the alley.

Yunho kept walking, slipped his hand into his own pocket and found his lighter. A few steps away, Yoochun noticed him and froze. In a matter of seconds, his face went from shock, to happiness, to wariness and then closed off completely.

Jaejoong wouldn’t have let any of those emotions show, but Yoochun was their emotional member.

“Need a light?” Yunho asked, holding out his lighter.

Yoochun looked at it for a moment and then took it, their fingers brushing. “T-thanks.”

It was polite, formal, and Yunho scowled. He leaned against the brick wall and took out his own cigarette. He took the lighter back from him.

They smoked in silence, and Yunho’s irritation grew. He was pretty sure it was unfounded and all his fault, but he didn’t care. Yunho watched fancams and promotions and JYJ behind the scenes videos, and he could almost pinpoint the exact moment that Jaejoong started looking at Yoochun differently.

Like how Jaejoong used to look at him.

Yoochun huffed out a lung-full of smoke, frustration echoing through the gray swirls. “Jaejoong loves you.”

Yunho did not want to talk about this. He’d talked to Yoochun only a few times since the lawsuit and it wasn’t ever about Jaejoong.

After almost two minutes, Yunho finally said, “He loves you.”

Yoochun sort of smiled and met his eyes. “He loves you more.”

Yunho rolled his eyes and fought the urge to sink into a childish game. “If he loved me, he wouldn’t be fucking you, now would he?”

Yoochun sighed and leaned his head against the brick wall. “Jaejoong ... Jaejoong is a feeler, hyung, you know that. He feels with his skin and his body.”

Yunho did know that. “Which makes his relationship with me nothing since it was oh so easy for him to fall into bed with you.”

“Easy?” Yoochun snorted. “If that’s the word for the crying and the violence and the bruises and the alcohol and the depression, then sure, it was easy.”

Yunho bit his lip against another retort about Jaejoong deserving what he got. He didn’t mean that at all. It was just a quick reflex to hurt.

“Look, hyung,” Yoochun said after a heavy drag. “Jaejoong is less of a mess now than he was a couple years ago. Even through videos I know you noticed him losing weight, losing sleep, losing his sanity. I won’t lie to you. I love Jaejoong, with every piece of me, but he doesn’t love me like that. He loves you like that. I wasn’t going to say no when his tears turned to moans and he begged me for it, just to make him feel something.”

“He loves you.”

“I know he does, but it’s still your name he whimpers in his sleep at night after I’ve fucked him into incoherency. He needs something. Someone. You aren’t available. I am. You come back, I’ll go back to loving him from afar.”

Yunho frowned and then glared. It wasn’t fair to Yoochun at all.

“Yeah,” Yoochun said and took a long drag from his cigarette. He blew out the smoke and waited until adding, “It really isn’t fair, but I’ve gotten used to being a YunJae shipper. You make him happy. I make him remember that he used to be happy. I’d rather have him happy.”

Yunho sighed.

Yoochun suddenly pulled out his phone, and hit a few buttons. Yunho should have known what he was doing, but it wasn’t until Jaejoong’s voice said, “Chunnie-ah” in his sing-song voice that he realized.

Yoochun held the phone out for him.

Jaejoong said his name again in the silence, questioning, confusing. And then again, voice rising in a not-so-frustrated sigh.

Yunho knew that sigh so well. He snatched the phone from Yoochun, turned off the speakerphone and put it up to his ear. He breathed and then had to swallow. His voice wouldn’t work.

“Chunnie?” Jaejoong whispered.

Yunho cleared his throat. “Hey Boo.”

Jaejoong gasped.

Neither said anything.

“Yunnie?”

“Hi.”

“Yunnie, oh god. Yunho-ah.”

The actual excitement in his voice pulled a reluctant smile from his lips.

“Hi, Joongie. How are you?”

“Tired. Okay. Great. Oh my god. How are you? Aren’t you promoting? How’s Changmin-ah? Is he eating enough? Why did you move out? Who’s supposed to watch the maknae when he’s all by himself?”

Yunho laughed. “Calm down. We both know I’m more of a mess without him than he is without me.”

“Who’s taking care of you, then?” Jaejoong asked carefully.

“No one.”

“Self-help.”

Yunho snorted. “It took you less than a minute to make a dirty joke.”

“I was holding myself back. Seriously, are you okay?”

Yunho smiled. “Right now? Yeah. I’m doing really well.”

“Me, too.”

Silence fell between them again, and Yunho let it. Just hearing him breathe was enough.

“We probably don’t have long to talk and we’re just sitting here quietly,” Jaejoong said.

Yunho cleared his throat. “We’ve never really had to talk.”

“No. It’s good to see that some things haven’t changed.”

“And some have,” Yunho said, slightly bitter.

Jaejoong sighed. “I’m not going to apologize.”

“I didn’t ask you to.”

“God, I love you. It’s so good to hear your voice.”

“Yeah.”

“I know I don’t deserve it at all, but ...”

Yunho let Jaejoong stew for a few seconds and then chuckled softly. “Of course, I still love you, Boo. That is one thing that will never change, no matter what or who you’re doing.”

“I love you. You know I love you, right?”

“Yes, I know, but--” Yunho shut up. He didn’t have the right to lecture Jaejoong.

“I’ll stop sleeping with him, I promise.”

Yunho tilted his head up and stared at the darkening sky. He felt his own phone vibrate. “You should, but only because it isn’t fair. He loves you just as much as I do. Maybe even more.”

“I know.”

“Then why do you hurt him?”

“Because he lets me.”

Yunho tried to swallow past the lump in his throat.

“We’re all hurting,” Jaejoong whispered. “He lets me because it makes me feel better, even if it’s at the cost of his own sanity.”

“And you ...”

“Yes. I do. I need it.”

“Not him?”

“Yes, but in different ways. Not in the way I need you, or Changminnie, or Su-ah.”

Yunho blinked and felt a tear on his cheek.

“I’ll stop sleeping with him, if you ... if you come and see me. Please. I know you can. I know you can come over now.”

Technically, he couldn’t, but he did know how. One of the reasons why he and Changmin were no longer living together was because it was harder for their managers to track where they went all the time.

“Again, you should because he’s your friend and you shouldn’t be taking advantage of his emotions.”

Jaejoong sighed.

“But I’ll come over.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

The cry of Yunho’s name echoed through the alley.

Yunho shut his eyes and heard the manager shout his name again. “I have to go.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll come over. I promise. I love you.”

“I love you.”

Yunho pulled the phone away from his ear and held it out. Yoochun took it, stepped into him and hugged him tightly. Yunho waited a moment and hugged him back.

“See you soon, hyung,” Yoochun said and then turned around and walked a few feet to a door.

“There you are,” Yunho’s manager said. “Come on. We are really behind schedule.”

Yunho lifted his mostly burned cigarette to his lips for one more drag.

His manager continued talking about the rest of the day and Yunho tried to think of when he could over to visit Jaejoong. It would have to be soon, before they started promotions in Japan again.

They entered the studio and Changmin glared at him. Yunho tried to tell him with his eyes, but Jaejoong really was the only one that he could do that with.

“Where the hell were you?” Changmin demanded.

“Smoke.”

“For almost twenty minutes?”

Yunho sighed. “Yeah, well, I had to suck on something.”

Changmin rolled his eyes, but Yunho saw his shoulders stiffen, so at least he understood. It had been a joke between the five of them, whenever Yunho and Jaejoong slipped into a room, closet or a bathroom. It was always because they had to suck on something.

“Don’t be crude,” a manager snapped.

Yunho did not apologize, but moved over to where Changmin was looking at their script. “So, how are you?” Changmin asked, though Yunho understood it to be asking how Jaejoong was.

“Good. I’m going to come over later.”

“Tonight?”

“If I can.”

Changmin frowned but said nothing else and nodded. They’d talk more when they weren’t surrounded by so many ears.

Tonight.

It sounded good. Promising.

Despite everything, Yunho was a bit happier during the interview. It was easier to smile at the stupid questions, and ignore Changmin’s disdain for his living conditions.

Tonight.


End file.
